I saw someone on facebook do this thing. So i thought it'de be cool if i did it as well. So i clicked on it and silently said to God "God, i want a word from it. and i believe the word is not going to be by coincidence or luck but by purpose." And here's what i got.

On this day of your life, Hannah, we believe God wants you to know... ...
that God has an important purpose for you, and made everything possible for you to succeed.
That's not to say it's an easy purpose, or a convenient one. It might very well seem hard or even impossible, but it only looks that way. The truth is that one day you will look back and see how all the pieces fit together. And how your life has been a complete and utter success.

And you know what? I believe it too. It really is the word that God wants to speak into my life. I have been struggling with my purpose in life, my purpose in God, and in who i am in God as well. Never in my christian walk have i been set back so much before, and never have i been so challanged in my faith.

In the not too long ago past, if there was a gun pointed in my face to disown jesus, i wouldnt have run away. But honestly, right now, im not too sure.

I still love Jesus but im just a little unsure of where my life is turning to. What im doing, what i shouldbe doing. Its all a blur and im still trying to decipher.

Should i continue track?
Should i remain in worship min?
Is it and was it ever destined for me to be a worship leader?
Was i ever made to be a somebody?

Recently, ive been feeling rather small in many ways.
In fact, i feel forgotten.
I dont know. Many things have happened and i guess many people have walked out of my life together with the changes that came. And im not emoing, but just sharing what i feel.

I feel fine with it actually.
Almost numb.
I thank God that at least i have found my place somewhere in Vj, the school he has intended for me Despite the many unfortunate events of the late, i sstill feel somehow that VJ was still the school intended for me. Like i said to myself in the beginning of the year, i smell destiny when i stepped into VJ.

But i still feel lonely in the places i shouldnt be.
Sometimes when you place expectations on people, they fail.
I've placed several expectations on people that i believed who would have cared but they ended up forgetting and placing me at a raher unimportant position of their lives.

But you know what?
I dont wish to be affected by this anylonger.
People fail.
People will always fal because they are people.
I fail too.

And i just have to accept that.

But God.
God never fails.
God will never fail and i just have to keep believing.
Its hard to believe in the things you cannot see.
But then again, thats what faith is about right?
Faith is believeing in what you cannot see.

I cant see the future, but i am believing for great things to come.
My purpose in God.
My future.
I ahve to leave it in his hands because if i leave it in my own or the world's hands, it will only come to ruin.

Faith.
Is believing in the things you cannot see.
And by beliving in what you cant see, the reward will be even greater.

I still dont know what my future holds.
Im still confuesd.
But i choose to trust in the one who holds my world in his hands.
My maker.
My friend.
My Jesus. (: